Previously, on The Dork Legacy: 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 1.4 1.5 2.0 2.1 Last time around, Einstein and Vanessa got hitched and glitched! So I had to reload. They got married again, but not before Einstein got abducted by aliens. An elephant made an appearance as well. Caedmon and Tara retired, to become my eternal crafting slaves lazy. Willoughby WooHoo'd everyone, while Mrs. Crumplebottom looked on. And Wander and Nariko were born! This update begins with this exciting shot. A pregnant man reading a book. I'm riveted. But a girl cheering for a baby? Yawn. The adults-to-adults-holding-babies ratio is unpleasantly low in this room. O.o That's...better. Goddamn Romance sims, I swear! 7/20 YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY THIS TIME, PEANUT!! (note: he is actually entirely fenced in, half of it doesn't show up because the bars are windows) WOOF WOOF I CAN'T ESCAPE HAHAHA YOU BASTARD. WHAT??!! NOOO! *slumps in shame* ... Caedmon: Oh, hello little baby! Caedmon: Here, have my cell phone. Perfectly natural segue, honestly. Are you effing serious? You actually rescued the baby from the kitchen floor?! >.> That's it, you're main heir. Einstein is moving out, you can keep his kids. Willoughby: I have X-ray vision. Caedmon: *plus!* Meet Mr. 8/20! Obviously he's not a cuddler. And Willoughby is a bit of a man. Man!birthins! Vanessa: Aaa! A tiny alien! Einstein: Sniff...he's beautiful. I think I'll name him... Bao-Dur. Vanessa: Are you serious? But Bao-Dur is kind of creepy! She's very concerned. But Bao-Dur it is. YOU BITCH. MY CONTROLLER WAS BROKEN. "Waah." Vanessa: I'm so blue-hoo-hoo blue-hoo-hoo blue-ho-ho-HOO! I'm so blue I don't know what to do! Oh, well that was an easy promotion. Willoughby: *is really good at this* This is Algren. Why Algren, you say? And not Mr. 9/20? Well, you'll find out. Um...guys...there's definitely someone sleeping in that bed. That's better. 9/20. Caedmon: Oh, Grump, let's be ignored together! ;-; Oh sure, make me feel bad would ya. HAHAHA The elephant is rideable. Einstein: Look at me, I'm Tony Jaa! Tara: OH GOD, no one's talked to me in like an hour! I'm freaking out! Einstein: Hey, mom, how are - Tara: NO ONE TALKS TO ME! FREAKING OUTTTT!! Einstein: O.O And now for a small section called, Let's Take A Break And See How Drizzt is Doing. Here's his happy wedlock picture. And this is his eldest daughter, Chansey. Yes, like the pokemon. I like the name, okay? And this is his younger daughter, Pichu. She has funny cheeks. Apparently I didn't take any makeover pictures, so: end segment. Vanessa's heir portrait is finished. I didn't want Einstein to paint his own, so that's coming a little later. Spying on garbage, are you? Shame! Why do all of my toddlers grow into the whiteboy fro? Anyway, this is Wander. And this is Nariko! Why do the Budges have it in for the Dorks so bad? Anette had to walk ALL THE WAY across TOWN to make it here, just to steal a paper that SHE HAS A COPY OF AT HOME. Her eyes are really close-set, but I kind of like her. And Wander is going to be a CLONE of his father, I can just tell. 10/20! Halfway there! Caedmon: Doot de doo...Minding my own business... Willoughby: *woohoos* I hate that vacationie. 11/20 though. OH NOES. Actually, I don't think I even have Risky WooHoo. I had Mr. 1/20 come over and Try For Baby with her because I love genetics. Okay, that is seriously adorable. Caedmon, I am beginning to forgive you for constantly stalking your daughter-in-law. It's Bao-Dur's birthday! Nice that either of his parents could make it. >.> Oh, them's some ugly cheeks. But...heck, he's pretty darn adorable. Look at him, in his little concert-pianist uniform. Aww. ...That's nice, Caed. Monkey Dude is back, not to steal the paper, but to eat out of the trash! Charming! Willoughby, you SLEPT with this?! Gross. Wait, let's get a closeup. HOLY CRAP. Willoughby wanted to see Algren again. The first time she'd ever wanted to see a conquest a second time. That's classy, Algren. And we get in... And we get out! Too hungry for woohoo?! Weakling! Vanessa got fat. I know, you can totally tell. Zzort! Just to let you know that Einstein is still around, bringing in the promotions and skilling up, and doing other things that don't make for interesting pictures. And check out who he brought home with him. I saw him and very nearly sent Willoughby after him, until it occurred to me that he's actually Balthazar Budge. Hot but married. Thanks, Celebrity Chef. Because pregnant women exerting themselves is amusing. Vanessa: I got promoted recently. Caedmon: Hah! I got you beat! I retired! Vanessa: Yeah? Well I had a baby! Caedmon: *maxes logic* Another bathroom birth. Sigh. Note that this is the SECOND smallest bathroom in the house. Meet Dante! He has all his father's genetics except for the red hair. Only good with other people's kids, Willoughby? Nariko looks like she's mentally retarded, kind of. But it's adorable. Willoughby: YEAH I'm so fit! Curtis Nott, er, I mean, 11/20: Is she gonna kiss me or what? I thought the censor bars deserved a little gender equality. Fitness is all the rage in this house. See? Meanwhile, Bao-Dur is still being taken care of by people other than his parents. Because both of them are skilling up. You may have escaped last time, Peanut, but let's see you escape a room with NO DOOR. And now I present, The Wooing Of Peanut: End segment. Yeah, that's all it took for: Peanut: Nom. Einstein: *is nommed* Einstein: HUURRRGGHH! I got to look at this picture for like ten freaking minutes while my game was switching the skins out. Einstein: Arooo! Peanut: My work here is done. *digs up Einstein's feet* Einstein: roo roo roo i did well in school roo roo I think he's got a good face for a werewolf. Wow. I forgot what Maxis eyes looked like. Yuck! Guess what want the whole household has? Except for Vanessa, of course. Einstein: Ugh, I don't WANNA be a human again! Two seconds earlier, and this would have been a shot of Tara getting the gold Flower Arranging Badge. Vanessa is like the most supportive wife ever. Also note the fear of Einstein being Cured of Lycanthropy. Woo. This is just a picture showing Caedmon paying the bills...Nothing more... Hey, that is SO not what I just directed you to do! Your children are growing up! Go celebrate! Hoorah! Oh yeah. Wander is IDENTICAL to his father. And Nariko is pretty cute, too. Yeah, okay, fine, NOW go ahead. >.< And that's it for this update! See you next time, in which babies will be birthed, birthdays will be had, and Willoughby gets married! And now, a question! Do you think I should make my screenshots smaller?Yes, because they take too long to load.Yes, because it makes the text harder to read.Yes, because of both of the above reasons.No, I can read the captions just fine and I like the details in the pictures.No, just make the font bigger like this entryOther (please explain below).Other suggestions: